okay, so after 32 days of continuous hell, mental instability and existential unrest, peaking at 28th of February when it all falls down, it's quite nice to have a recap of what happened, isn't it?
timestamps, what I thought what happened, and what actually was meant to happen.
[13rd of February] my family had intentions about me going to the US in the next 2 years of high school (for the sake of my cousins doing that), asking what I'm interested and I got heavily discouraged by what they said
what I thought shit shit shit but may be that was just for fun
reality no this is a real thing, do think about it
[26th February] I was caught being fucking upset in front of * a lot of people *
what I thought no mom is so fake this is not how you live life gotta be real to your emotions blah blah blah, no I don't wanna do long distance relationship
reality yes it's essential to cheer up urself a bit and really impress your future parents in law don't cha, your bf looks super dope and mlem mlem while he's taking care of the baby thing you should know you're lucky, chill chill chill
[28th February] the last day before school, the week that mock exam starts, going to the US thingy hit again, everything was pure shit
what I thought no im not going to pass this, * footage bombarding my bf with my emotional ass *, I don't want to go to school oh no, I hate capitalism and this society why can't u guys be like european or scandinavian countries (wait IB comes from Sweden)
reality this is to slap in u bitch fei for not studying (or studying the wrong way), just better get stuff rolled/ crammed u know
[3rd March] the start of vụng trộm, had my first kiss
what I thought hell hell hell this is too fucking amazing why didn't i discover this sooner
reality moma im marrying him dont stop mi
[12nd March] I'm done with mocks, gave my bf his first bj
what I thought HIGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
reality HIGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
[13rd March] - the IB form hit the deadline, I need to hand it in asap
what I thought why don't you respect my subject selection choices such asian parents omg I don't wanna do long distance relationship, what's wrong studying psychology, I hate this house, community, society, school that I'm going to (exc for my friends and my bf of course)
reality they actually want the best for you and you can always choose psychology 2 years later after showing enough passion about it, and IB subject selection don't really matter to uni majors
* sigh *
next blog is gonna be about lesson I'd learnt and what I overcame :3 stay tuned
17/3/2021.
Comments